LiveFreeLoveHard

Bringing in the New Year Tips - 2019!! My fellow Wife-Lifers, we have arrived to the threshold of 2019.  Congratulations on making it through this year.  It has been a wild ride.  Regardless of how your 2018 was, whether there was heartache and mistakes or big breaks and booty shakes, it's time to put the year behind us.  You can't drive forward and look in your rear view mirror at the same time, its dangerous - in life and on the road.   So, here are the rules for you Mrs. Fabulous: 1)  Tonight, understand no matter what, that you are the most beautiful, sexiest woman in the world to your husband.  This is factual, but we often don't believe it.  In God's design, Eve was made perfect for Adam.  And when Adam beheld her, his jaw dropped and the world stopped.  He followed her around like a puppy dog.  God has not changed his design for us.  You are Eve to your Adam. Revel in it and strut in it!    2)  I give you permission to be a freak!  Yes!  We all k

So, I was compelled to start this series because I want to be happily married till death do us part.  I am thrilled by the opportunity to live this journey with my favorite person - you know, newlywed stuff.  I wanted to find a way to bottle this time of my life, with my husband, and hold onto it, for the rest of our lives.  He's such a wonderful man!   We all know that there are ups and downs in life, and marriage is no different.  But it's worth it.  And if you ever questioned that, here is a final declaration - Yes!  It's worth it.   I'm writing this to myself in 5,10, 20 years. I'm writing this to my mom, my best friend, my sister, and my fellow wives.  You have been in my shoes and I will be in yours, let us help one another safely through this journey.  And let's have some fun while doing it!! I am convinced, with what I see on tv and in movies, that marriage is under attack.  Marriage is always on the defense from the onslaught of bad jokes, dying sex

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…Ephesians 3:20 Do you ever wake up in the morning feeling, blah!   Feeling like you’re just going through the motions with no real sense of joy, excitement or expectancy.   You feel like today is going to be just another same ole, same ole day.   It actually makes you linger in bed a little longer because you don’t really have anything that’s pushing you to get up and greet the day.   That’s what today was like for me. Without sounding dismissive about the blessings God is filling my life with, I’m not saying my feelings are valid. I’m just saying that’s what I felt.   I have a lot to be thankful for and I see God all around me, but this morning it took some prompting, praying and reading my Word to get my mind back on the right track.   As I was making coffee, my husband asked me, “Is everything alright?”   He noticed the lackadaisicalness with whic

So, this morning I had to reel my thoughts in several times to get through a one minute prayer.  "Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for waking me up this morning and thank you for this day [ok, today I want to make sure I drop off the letter in the mail and wash the clothes we need for this trip] and help me to focus on you, Lord. [I'm gonna set a reminder to call Susan back later this morning (grab my phone, Facebook pops up, begin scrolling...10 minutes later) Lord, I love you, in Jesus' name I pray, Amen. It's not a very productive prayer.  It's not a focused prayer.  It's just what seems to happen when I sit down and desire to spend time with God.  I am so easily distracted.  I am flooded by thoughts, to-do's, happenings of the day, that getting quiet with God for Him to speak in my life has become that challenging.  And with the limited time I do have to devote to sitting down with him in the early hours of the morning, if I can't commit my thought

Do you remember when you first learned your ABC's?  In order to memorize them, we sang songs, wrote them down, did picture associations, and drowned ourselves in the alphabets until we had it down.  We played with letter blocks.  Everywhere we turned, someone was trying to show us an alphabet.  Sound this word out.  What letter does "airplane" start with?  If you have young children right now, this is likely on today's agenda. Why do we do this?  Because we want to learn it, know it, and have it be a part of our natural understanding.  I've been a Christian a long time, but I realize that I have to approach the word of God with the same diligence as I did when learning the alphabets.  I have to study it, say it out loud, memorize it, hear it back, make word associations, revere it and spend time in it.  Why?  Because I want to learn it, know it and have it be a part of my natural understanding - how I process the world I live in. We can lose a sense of connect

I asked before, what are you believing God for?   Now, I’m going to take it one step further and ask what are you living like you believe God for?   From the outside looking in, what might a friend say about what you believe God for?   Are you working toward something that is bigger than you, and you continue to press in and press on, knowing that God will help you along the way?   To truly live by faith, we have to be willing to live with a bigger vision than we could ever truly accomplish.   Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not yet seen.   Well, I don’t hope for things that I can do on my own.   I don’t hope to make it to the store and buy food when I have a pocket full of money and a car to get there.   I hope for what I don’t have.    I hope for things for my future and my family.   The evidence of things not yet seen, I believe is the action behind the belief that we will have what we hope for.   If you are hoping for a healt

Sometimes I’m really hard on myself.   There is a disparity between where I am and where I want to be.   I’ll never be perfect, and that’s never been my burden.   I’ve always wanted to do my best.   And I feel an incredible sense of satisfaction when I’ve given my best effort.   When you know you’ve left it all out on the field, when you’ve given it your all, when you’ve fought till your last breath.   There is a sense of peace when you live there, and I want to live there more often than not. Living there requires passion.   That’s where some get lost.   Not knowing what their passion is.   To give your all, there has to be something that you care enough about that you’ll exhaust yourself, staying up late to get it done.   You’ll wake up early to get closer to achieving it.   There isn’t anything easy about it, except loving it.   So, that’s what drives you to keep pressing toward it.   As the apostle Paul said in Philippians 3:13, “Brothers, I do not consider myself to have taken hol

Matthew 12:33 states, "Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit." Our thoughts roll off our tongue.  The things we've been thinking about, eventually come flying out of our mouths whether we like it or not.  And it's definitely challenging to stop thinking wrong thoughts or to start thinking right thoughts.  Many authors have declared the importance of right thinking and getting our thought life pure.  Joyce Meyer's book, Battlefield of the Mind , is one of my personal favorites, as it highlights the weapons of praise, prayer and the Word to fortify our minds. Why do we have such a hard time controlling our thoughts?   Because we leave them on automatic playback. I have such a hard time with this because the enemy has already created strongholds in my life from my past that still plague me today.  I consider myself a "strong" person, but I struggle with trust i

I shine as a bright star.   I cannot blend in and fit in.   I stick out.   I am sanctified.   Just one glance at me and my uniqueness is spotted and proclaimed.   My light cannot be hidden.   The enemy will not dismiss me and go along his way because I try to blend in.   No. He still attacks relentlessly.   He desires to completely destroy me.   I don’t have to be in the fight.   He will bring the fight to me.   Why?   Because he knows how powerful I really am, even if I try to hide it.   And if he can destroy me while I am weak, he will never have to fight a mighty adversary.   But friends, I have decided not to be an easy target for the enemy.   When he comes upon me, I will be ready to fight the good fight of the faith and to stand firm.   I have no intention of cowering or wavering.   I refuse to bow out of a race I am slated to win anyway.   I have no desire to give up my for sure victory to one who is lesser than I.   Here is where I stand on this matter.   When the waves

Our relationship with Christ is weak.   It won’t survive wealth. And that’s why so many Christians are broke today.   God loves us too much to allow wealth, or anything for that matter, to get in the way of our relationship with him.   The inheritance is stored away for an appointed time until we will be able to handle it, if ever at all.   So, we can stop shaking our fists at God, wondering why he hasn’t saved us from our financial burdens.   It is not his storehouse that is empty, it is our devotion to him.   In Howard Dayton’s book, Your Money Counts, he cites, “Someone once observed that for every 99 people who can be poor and remain close to Christ, only one can become wealthy and maintain close fellowship with Him.”  Deuteronomy 31:20-21 states: “When I have brought them into the land flowing with milk and honey, the land I promised on oath to their forefathers, and when they eat their fill and thrive, they will turn to other gods and worship them, rejecting me and

Amos 6:1-7 is a call to action for the blessed, full, contented individuals of the time.  During this time there were some who lived incredibly rich and abundant lives, while others were extremely poor.  Kind of like today, isn't it?  The Lord said, there will always be the poor among us.  Knowing that, I'm not sure he was looking to fix the economic imbalance, but more so fix our internal dispositions.  The Lord desires us to take care of one another.  He desires the fortunate to consider the unfortunate.  He desires the haves to look after the have nots.  He is pleased when the wealthy take care of the poor. The thought behind it is simple.  If you can, you should.  Giving keeps us from becoming greedy, insatiable people.  I often find myself saying "But I barely have..." and the Lord corrects me.  "A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed." Proverbs 11:25. My pastor, Josh Teis, in his last sermon series, said, &quo

When I found this scripture in the Bible, I started laughing so hard.   It was there, waiting on me to become a professional real estate agent, so I would actually understand it. “It’s no good, it’s no good!” says the buyer; then off he goes to boast about his purchase.” Proverbs 20:14 (NIV). “The buyer haggles over the price, saying, “It’s worthless,” then brags about getting a bargain!” (NLT). Hilarious.   All of my real estate agents know what I’m talking about.   We have buyers like this.   We have seen this first hand.   This morning I grabbed my Bible, looking for it’s truths to touch my life and help me along my day, and I found this.   It just goes to show that when people start saying that the Bible is outdated and doesn’t deal with the issues of today.   Or when they say they can’t get specifics, everything is generalities and we have to come up with our own understanding.   This is how God responds to that!   He is as relevant as the latest tweet;

"Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure.  The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance.  I will praise the Lord who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.  I have set the Lord always before me.  Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken."  Psalm 16:5-8 This is one of my favorite bible verses.  It may be thee favorite bible verse.  There is something so comforting in the power and contentment, the acceptance and the position of the psalmist life.  It is as if he has arrived at a place of total dependence and acceptance of wherever he is in his life.  It's beautifully peaceful.  Speak this scripture aloud, over your life, with where you are in mind (financially, spiritually, emotionally, physically) and see if God doesn't meet you right there where you are. It's a 'thank you' to God.  It's a 'hats off to you, Lord' kind of scriptur

Unless you're exercising on a treadmill, most people don't like to run in place.  No one desires to exhaust themselves to no end, only to look up and be in the same predicament you were when you started out; to be in the same mess time and time again. Yet there are some people who pray the same prayers and read the same few scriptures all their life.  And their lives show the stagnancy of their prayers.  Now, I have some oldies but goodies myself, but I've come to realize that God has written a whole book to be digested and not just picked through.  He's laid out a buffet and you keep eating that same ol' spaghetti. Memorize a new verse.  Read a new chapter.  Venture to some part of the bible that you have never read before.  Even if you have read all of the bible, there are some parts that you haven't spent as much time in - meditate on that. Put a new prayer in your heart.  Ask God for something new.  This is not a materialistic exercise where we're as

I'll admit, I'm exhausted.  There seems to not be enough time in the day for me to do what I need to do. The clothes make it to the washer but not the dryer, then they start to smell and need to be re-washed (geesh!).  Then if I do happen to get them from the washer to the dryer, they sit waiting to be folded for several days in the laundry basket.  I haven't cooked a meal at home in weeks.  When I made chicken enchiladas the other day, they loved it and haven't stopped praising how delicious it was - probably out of sheer bliss that it wasn't another frozen pizza.  My blog hasn't been written in two weeks and my morning prayer time is getting shorter and shorter.  Do I want to be successful that bad? I've been waking up earlier and earlier but still not getting a chance to study my word.  I have been giving my all to my real estate business - building it up, studying, listening to real estate coaches and what I consider self-help teachers. Has there alway

When we are first learning to color, we are instructed to stay in the lines.   I was great at coloring.   My lines were sharp and controlled.   In fact, in the 5 th grade I received a reward for great penmanship.   I’m not even sure they give those kinds of rewards anymore.   But as I matured, so did life.   And life required a more blended approach.   It was acceptable to blur the lines, to smudge the sharp edges to make beautiful pieces of art.   It is a type of “coming of age.”   You have to first learn the skill of control and staying in the lines, before you can learn the skill of blending.   And learn it quickly we must, because life is messy.   There is much tension right now, with keeping things separate.   Separate church and state; take God out of schools; keep God out of fast food (Chick Fil-A).   Wow, Really?!      And there are so many more references of this desperate attempt to separate, and to keep apart.   Segregation is a way of the past, folks, not the futur

I'm all over the place this morning.  I need Jesus, bad!  I had so much anxiety last night that I was throwing up.  Yes, disgusting, but true.  I have anxiety about work, family stuff, bills to be paid, things to be cleaned, managing my time, hopes and dreams I have.  I crawled out of bed this morning, kind of upset.  I'm a little bothered by everything on my plate.  And where is my joy?  I want to be happy!  And then you die. Wait...what?  "Whatever you do, do well.  For when you go to the grave, there will be no work or planning or knowledge or wisdom." Ecclesiastes 9:10.  Wow, where did that scripture come from?  I asked, but I already knew.  God has a way of giving us what we need, even if it is just a little perspective. So, I'm overwhelmed with the busyness of life, praying for help, and God says, look on the bright side, at least you're alive.  When you die, poof, no errands to run!  No job to go to!  No nagging customers to listen to!  No toys to

Do you know why I wake up every morning and read my Bible?   It’s because I constantly need to be reminded of what I already know, all the time.   Sounds silly, but it’s so necessary.   I tell my stepdaughter to wash her hands every time she goes into the kitchen.   I will say this maybe 5 times a day.   One or two times, she’ll do it on her own and I’ll sing her praises.   An hour later, I’ll have to remind her again, “Wash your hands.”   “Oh yeah,” she says, as if she can recall someone once told her this years ago.   How quickly we forget.   I mean, we literally have the worst memories when it comes to certain things.   Even Paul knew how awful we were at remembering.   In Ephesians 2:5b, he declares, “it is by grace you have been saved.” And in 3 short verses, he exclaims, “For it is by grace you have been saved” Ephesians 2:8.   Same chapter, one sentence later!   I can appreciate that he knew who he was dealing with.   Back in his day there were no cell phones, and people w

Ruth 1:16-17: But Ruth replied, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you.   Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay.   Your people will be my people and your God my God.   Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried.   May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me.”   When Naomi realized that Ruth was determined to go with her, she stopped urging her. DECIDE – At all costs, to follow God, the one and only true God.   DECIDE that nothing else makes sense other than that.   I get a lot of push back from work and I have many concerns about my future there and my commitment.    Before I got the job, I said,   “I’m going to do 5 years at my next job,” and now I’m looking to get out within one year.   My thoughts: I’m trying to start my business or really get something else going because I cannot see myself there long term. As you know, I’ve had one foot in and one foot out, and that’s why I have

I have to grow.   I’ve always been one foot in and one foot out, in everything - except my education.   And that’s the one thing that I said, no matter what – I’m completing.   And God was faithful to stand by me throughout that time.   I know He’s calling me to grow here.   He’s taking away every fail-safe by moving me out to Las Vegas, making me have to figure things out and get things done on my own, and its causing me to grow.   He’s given me a man who is not unstable and flaky, and who causes me to stick with things.   I’ve had to be patient with him, even when I didn’t want to, and I am growing.   I see the wonderful work God is doing in my life.   I need to anticipate the trials and the struggles and be prepared to do the work.   What is that work?   The work of endurance and persistence. Life does not owe me anything.   I have a vision for my life and now, I have to pursue it and work towards that better future for myself and my family.   I have been called to a life of

Last night, I was talking about passion.  What am I waiting for to live a life full of passion?  I know I have it because Christ lives in me, and Jesus Christ is passion personified.  He is passion in godly form and His blood runs through my veins. Am I waiting for a better job? A better home? A better situation to be in?  More finances? No!  I have all that I need to do all things well and all things with passion.  I can pour out my life now .  Tomorrow is not promised to any of us and we do not know the day or the hour when we will be called home.  If there is anything to be done, let me do it today with passion and with fullness! I'm going to stop watching the clock at work and stop looking at my to-do list with disdain.  I have things in my life that must be done, things that need to be done, and things that I want to do.  May I do all things with passion and consideration.  Not giving thought to everything that can go wrong or not going according to my plan, but with accep

Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”   Even though this is the most popular part of that chapter, it goes on to say in verse 12, “Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.   You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.   I will be found by you,” declares the Lord… I feel convicted in my spirit because I know better, but I just get caught up with the dreaming and hoping and future part.   I desire a home for my family, a thriving career, healthy children and sure, some material things to enjoy.   I know that God has wonderful things in store for me, but I wonder if there is something I can do to “hurry” the process along a bit.   “Lord, I know you have plans for me, but can you let me in on your time table?” I find myself asking.   In my years of loving the Lord and being loved by Him, I could see Him

I just want to be there already!   I want the dream house, the dream career, the dream car, the dream family, the dream body, the dream situation.   I feel like I’m always working toward something and on something.   Certainly, I’ve seen massive growth in my life, but there are so many more things, I still want to have in place already.   If you’ve been working out daily and watching your food intake and counting calories, you see your goal in the distance – the goal weight (still not reached).   If only I can lose (X) amount of pounds, then I’ll be in the best shape of my life.   Even if you’re working in a great career, “If only I can get (X) position, then I’ll be set.   If you’re trying to find the room in your 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom house, for those extra items, you may be daydreaming of that home with the perfect storage space, that has the office you’ve always wanted, so you can finally start that business you’ve always dreamed of.   Oh no, this bucket has stopped on me for the

Since corporations and LLC’s are not a protected class of the Fair Housing Act, then yes, I can say what I’m about to say.   Homeowners, do you really want to sell your home to an LLC, or corporation?   Consider this, with the claims that you will save a “ton” of money in fees by not using a real estate agent, these business entities are not giving you the whole story.    And why would they?   You’re not asking for it and you’re not paying attention enough to see what the big picture is. The last time someone told me cheaper, faster, more convenient, we ended up with the fast food industry boom.   Now, I’m not saying, I don’t enjoy a burger and fries as much as the next person - in my car, driving 40 mph.   I am saying history tends to repeat itself and we should just take note of what’s happening in the housing market.   The American dream has been supercharged and overdosed.   Instead of getting a stable job and owning a home to raise a family and enjoy life, people are dri